9 months later and how life has become...

At 25 never did I know that I would be thrown a fast ball that would change my life for good. 


9 months ago my life changed in the most dramatic way.... I learned the meaning of CRPS. Many might ask what that is. Well it is short for Complex Regional Pain Syndrome.  To many that name rings no bell and even when I heard it, I was thoroughly confused and really scared. So I decided to go and google it as most people would do. According to wikipedia CRPS is " a chronic progressive disease characterized by severe pain, swelling and changes in the skin" I went on to read up on articles and I think I cried about it over and over again after reading the horror stories about it. So I decided not to bother to read anymore stories on the internet for my own sanity.  


Many of you might ask how I got CRPS. Well the story is not as interesting as you all might believe it to me.  I was working late and slipped on a sheet of ice and twisted my left ankle after slipping on ice. The funny thing is I have sprained my ankle many times before and have walked on it a week after or maybe 2 weeks later maximum, but this time was different.  


I was put on crutches as the emergency doctor at the walk-in clinic believed it was just a sprained ankle and thought I would be back to normal within a week. So I followed instructions knowing no better. A week went by and no change in my foot. It was a different color and extremely sensitive and painful to touch. I started to wonder what was going on. I could hardly sleep as the pain I would awaken in the middle of the night with pain. I went to see my chiropractor and she tried to see if that might help however she couldn't even touch my foot without me screaming in pain. She was shocked as she had always told me I have a very high pain threshold and that something does not seem right with my foot.   A few months passed and many doctors which were appointed by WCB along with it, all not really knowing what was going on.  On top of seeing these doctors, I endured test after test after test, which all came back normal. So I really thought I was going mad. Nothing was showing up and my anxiety rose. All I wanted was someone to tell me what was going on as nothing was making sense to me. Finally my prayers were answered and one doctor told me to get off my crutches and use a cane and introduced me to the "lovely" world of CRPS. That is when my whole life changed. 


I went home after buying the cane and I cried. As I knew what might be ahead for me. Life of medication, life with a cane. And thought to myself how at 25 am I dealing with this type of disease.  I went into a slight depression where I became very upset and emotional. I became very angry as well with my life and started to show signs of self pity, which some of my friends got me out of.  


On top of all that was going on with me with I landed myself on unemployment insurance. Yes my company gave me a severance package after WCB cut me off as they have done to many others like myself. Thankfully that has been the best thing for me! I finally found myself a specialist who deals with CRPS and was able to get treatment started right away.  


I since have had many up and down days and my health has not been the same.  I have had to give up many of the things I love. I have had to understand how to deal with pain on a day to day basis and really enjoying many things I used to enjoy before I really don't care for much anymore.  There were many months were I did nothing. I sat at home day after day and just wished I was someone else. I luckily don't use my cane, but the pain is still a daily battle.  


However, not everything is bad about this situation. I was able to realize one dream which I have had for as long as I can remember. I have wanted a dog for probably 20 years and finally I was able to make it finally come true. I got a little white and brown maltese poodle who is the love of my life. She makes me smile whenever I have pain and makes my days so joyful in so many ways.  I miss her whenever I have to leave the house and await the time I return home to find her waiting at the door for my arrival. 


Well that is all for now. I will tell you all more about what my day consists of at a different time.